苗疆小说网

第76章（第1页）

“Myexcellentfatherdiedaboutfiveyearsago;andhisattachmenttoMr。Wickhamwastothelastsosteady，thatinhiswillheparticularlyrecommendedittome，topromotehisadvancementinthebestmannerthathisprofessionmightallow—andifhetookorders，desiredthatavaluablefamilylivingmightbehisassoonasitbecamevacant。Therewasalsoalegacyofonethousandpounds。Hisownfatherdidnotlongsurvivemine，andwithinhalfayearfromtheseevents，Mr。Wickhamwrotetoinformmethat，havingfinallyresolvedagainsttakingorders，hehopedIshouldnotthinkitunreasonableforhimtoexpectsomemoreimmediatepecuniaryadvantage，inlieuofthepreferment，bywhichhecouldnotbebenefited。Hehadsomeintention，headded，ofstudyingthelaw，andImustbeawarethattheinterestofonethousandpoundswouldbeaveryinsufficientsupporttherein。Iratherwished，thanbelievedhimtobesincere;but，atanyrate，wasperfectlyreadytoaccedetohisproposal。IknewthatMr。Wickhamoughtnottobeaclergyman;thebusinesswasthereforesoonsettled—heresignedallclaimtoassistanceinthechurch，wereitpossiblethathecouldeverbeinasituationtoreceiveit，andacceptedinreturnthreethousandpounds。Allconnectionbetweenusseemednowdissolved。IthoughttooillofhimtoinvitehimtoPemberley，oradmithissocietyintown。IntownIbelievehechieflylived，buthisstudyingthelawwasamerepretence，andbeingnowfreefromallrestraint，hislifewasalifeofidlenessanddissipation。ForaboutthreeyearsIheardlittleofhim;butonthedeceaseoftheincumbentofthelivingwhichhadbeendesignedforhim，heappliedtomeagainbyletterforthepresentation。Hiscircumstances，heassuredme，andIhadnodifficultyinbelievingit，wereexceedinglybad。Hehadfoundthelawamostunprofitablestudy，andwasnowabsolutelyresolvedonbeingordained，ifIwouldpresenthimtothelivinginquestion—ofwhichhetrustedtherecouldbelittledoubt，ashewaswellassuredthatIhadnootherpersontoprovidefor，andIcouldnothaveforgottenmyreveredfathersintentions。Youwillhardlyblamemeforrefusingtocomplywiththisentreaty，orforresistingeveryrepetitiontoit。Hisresentmentwasinproportiontothedistressofhiscircumstances—andhewasdoubtlessasviolentinhisabuseofmetoothersasinhisreproachestomyself。Afterthisperiodeveryappearanceofacquaintancewasdropped。HowhelivedIknownot。Butlastsummerhewasagainmostpainfullyobtrudedonmynotice。

“ImustnowmentionacircumstancewhichIwouldwishtoforgetmyself，andwhichnoobligationlessthanthepresentshouldinducemetounfoldtoanyhumanbeing。Havingsaidthusmuch，Ifeelnodoubtofyoursecrecy。Mysister，whoismorethantenyearsmyjunior，waslefttotheguardianshipofmymothersnephew，ColonelFitzwilliam，andmyself。Aboutayearago，shewastakenfromschool，andanestablishmentformedforherinLondon;andlastsummershewentwiththeladywhopresidedoverit，toRamsgate;andthitheralsowentMr。Wickham，undoubtedlybydesign;forthereprovedtohavebeenaprioracquaintancebetweenhimandMrs。Younge，inwhosecharacterweweremostunhappilydeceived;andbyherconnivanceandaid，hesofarrecommendedhimselftoGeorgiana，whoseaffectionateheartretainedastrongimpressionofhiskindnesstoherasachild，thatshewaspersuadedtobelieveherselfinlove，andtoconsenttoanelopement。Shewasthenbutfifteen，whichmustbeherexcuse;andafterstatingherimprudence，Iamhappytoadd，thatIowedtheknowledgeofittoherself。Ijoinedthemunexpectedlyadayortwobeforetheintendedelopement，andthenGeorgiana，unabletosupporttheideaofgrievingandoffendingabrotherwhomshealmostlookeduptoasafather，acknowledgedthewholetome。YoumayimaginewhatIfeltandhowIacted。Regardformysisterscreditandfeelingspreventedanypublicexposure;butIwrotetoMr。Wickham，wholefttheplaceimmediately，andMrs。Youngewasofcourseremovedfromhercharge。Mr。Wickhamschiefobjectwasunquestionablymysistersfortune，whichisthirtythousandpounds;butIcannothelpsupposingthatthehopeofrevenginghimselfonmewasastronginducement。Hisrevengewouldhavebeencompleteindeed。

“This，madam，isafaithfulnarrativeofeveryeventinwhichwehavebeenconcernedtogether;andifyoudonotabsolutelyrejectitasfalse，youwill，Ihope，acquitmehenceforthofcrueltytowardsMr。Wickham。Iknownotinwhatmanner，underwhatformoffalsehoodhehadimposedonyou;buthissuccessisnotperhapstobewonderedat。Ignorantasyoupreviouslywereofeverythingconcerningeither，detectioncouldnotbeinyourpower，andsuspicioncertainlynotinyourinclination。

“Youmaypossiblywonderwhyallthiswasnottoldyoulastnight;butIwasnotthenmasterenoughofmyselftoknowwhatcouldoroughttoberevealed。Forthetruthofeverythinghererelated，IcanappealmoreparticularlytothetestimonyofColonelFitzwilliam，who，fromournearrelationshipandconstantintimacy，and，stillmore，asoneoftheexecutorsofmyfatherswill，hasbeenunavoidablyacquaintedwitheveryparticularofthesetransactions。Ifyourabhorrenceofmeshouldmakemyassertionsvalueless，youcannotbepreventedbythesamecausefromconfidinginmycousin;andthattheremaybethepossibilityofconsultinghim，Ishallendeavourtofindsomeopportunityofputtingthisletterinyourhandsinthecourseofthemorning。Iwillonlyadd，Godblessyou。